Future in advance

First of all , I really would like to thank my mum giving me a chance to continue my studies.
And of course the fees is pretty huge. I don't think that my current situation can really afford it.

I'm struggling with it. I'm worries about it. Shouldn't I continue to study or just come out and work for it.

I don't know which one is the better choice among it.

I don't know.

So, I'd calculate all the fees that I could spend in this coming 3 years.
It's about RM70k, not yet including about the fees of transportation.

Study in other states , sounds like fun , but for my family it is a burden.

It's my fault.  Because I didn't make it with local university. And also getting a good results like other people was.

I call her as senior. I saw her help me to find a hostel for me in FB group.
We just know each other through my friend introduce me to her.
She doesn't have the responsibility to help.
Honestly , she doesn't have.
But she still help me.

I'm feeling guilty for that.
I know she is trying her best to help me so that I can study at there with a comfortable way .

BTW, still have to thanks for the person whoever helped me so much along the way.
Including my mum who sacrifice herself just for me.

I know it's not easy but I have to face it in the end.

DO NOT LET them disappointed again.
For the sake of myself but not others.

Unfortunately. I didn't win the jackpot for today.
Yeah, if I did it, I no need to worry about the fees and also living costs.
But too bad , I have no luck.